Monday, December 15, 2008

What was the right thing to do?

Last night, Tyler and I braved the cold and trekked across town to the evening children's Christmas program at church.

After the program, the man behind me told me I had done a nice job with the children's story. I have never seen him before. But, that's not saying much. And the fact that he knows that I did the children's story means he was at least at our morning service last Sunday or this one.

When we were ready to leave, he followed us upstairs and was putting his coat on. I was telling Tyler he needed to wear his coat because it is cold outside. (I don't understand why he has to be coerced into putting a coat on, but whatever).

Anyway, this man commented that he had to walk home.

At this point, I'm asking myself whether I should offer to take him home. But, I have a weird feeling about having a strange man in the car, and honestly really don't want to do so.

I asked how far he had to walk. He said about two blocks "into the wind."

I felt this internal struggle. As a Christian, I have many times heard the analogy of caring for one another like we are caring for Christ; or like we want to be cared for. But, on the other hand, what if he is not just an innocent man who needs a ride? (And here is where my worrying, paranoid mind started to get the best of me). I was alone with Tyler...what if he would do something to us?

Instead of offering, I just said something like, "Wow, it's really cold to be walking." And he left.

I keep replaying this conversation in my mind. Wondering if I did the right thing by not offering a ride...

I don't know why, probably just because I'm weird and think of such things, but I've often wondered what I would do if I was alone and a man needed help - or a ride. Now I know. I will chicken out. But, though I'm not proud of it, I honestly think I'd do the same thing again. I just hope I haven't hurt his feelings, or made him feel unwelcome by not offering.

What about you? Anyone else think they'd do something different, or the same? Anyone been in a similar situation? Any thoughts, any, are welcome. (I won't be offended).


Stacey said...

Hi Melody! I found your blog through Kim's and thought I would say hi!

I think I would have done the same thing, it is just sad that we live in these times but we do. I'm not sure we can be too careful! But it is hard too because we sure want to show Christ's love... its just a tough one.

Melody Stuckey said...

Hi, Stacey! Because you commented, I was able to link to your blog - I'm excited to read it to keep up with you! :)

Kris said...

Well, I can say without a doubt, Mel, that I would've done the same thing. I'm probably on the hyper-sensitive (maybe paranoid) side but I'm just too aware of the negative stories. I just think your safety and the safety of your child are very precious. Perhaps if Wayne had been there with you, it would have been different. My hope would be also that many men are aware of the hesitancy that females would have in a situation like this one. Saying a little prayer and trusting that God is in control on the situation feels sufficient to me... or at least that's what I would've tried to convince myself. :)

Carrie said...

Well, I'm very "TIM!!! LET'S STOP AND HELP THOSE PEOPLE"-ey, often to the chagrin and sighing eye-rolling of my husband. I have probably done some unwise helping in the past. But since the kids have been born, unless it's woman, I don't. ESPECIALLY if I have one of the boys with me. There are too many stories, and I would NEVER want my boys to be hurt and I want my boys to have a mommy - and if it's a guy, he'll be fine. I know what you mean, though, about that internal see-sawing. There's too am

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